


i'm not lying.

by Anonymous



Series: the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts. [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angry Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort/Angst, Dream Needs A Hug, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Insecure Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Long-Haired Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Protective GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Queerplatonic Relationships, Self-Harm, Soft Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Soft GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Soft Sapnap, Songfic, dream and sapnap are childhood friends, dream misses sapnap, i adore my beta reader, patches supremacy, woowoo speedran this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 20:01:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28783845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: dream isn't okay. he hasn't been for a while. sap and george notice.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & GeorgeNotFound & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Series: the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts. [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2109159
Comments: 8
Kudos: 231
Collections: Anonymous





	i'm not lying.

**Author's Note:**

> hey! please read the tags! for any triggers please please :((( take care of yourself :) 
> 
> song is can ghosts be gay? by carpetgarden

he has a salty taste in his mouth, from the crying. his throat burns, fingernails digging into his forearm. leaving red indents, dry blood underneath his nails. he whimpers, and quickly puts his hands over his mouth. holding as hard as he can, to not let anymore noise escape him. green eyes bloodshot, he hasn’t slept in two days. everything is too loud.

_i don’t know why, but i hate myself._

he hears his computer make a noise, someone is messaging him on discord? someone is spamming him on discord, probably sap or george. 

he sighs and lifts himself off the bed groggily, this is his first time getting out of bed, it’s 5:47 pm. 

  
  


_sapnap: vc2_

_vc2_

_vc2_

_vc2_

and then as dream harshly rubs his eyes, trying to will the exhaustion away once more. _“dream?”_ he groans, softly, and reluctantly goes to vc2. sap and george are here, dream’s phone goes off, george is live. george is live. he can’t- he can't talk right now. “hey-” he leaves the call. 

_i don’t know why, but i wanna die._

patches bumps the door open and jumps onto the bed, and pushes her head against his face. then looks at him, pupils wide almost as if asking, “what’s wrong?” he gives her a watery smile and pets her. she’s probably hungry.

he goes to the kitchen, roughly pulling his hair. he needs a haircut, it’s up to his shoulders, he doesn’t even care for it. it’s greasy, ends still dyed green from when sapnap had last visited. he smiles fondly at the memory, maybe if the younger boy were here things would be better. dream misses him, misses his touch. he goes into the lower cabinet, looking for the wet food. he grabs it and pulls the tab off. pours it into her small bowl. eyes crinkling happily when she seems to purr in satisfaction.

he walks back to his room, steps making small thumps against the cold floor. he leaves the door open slightly, in case patches wants to come in. he goes back to his computer, turns it back on and sees sap has been messaging him.

_dream_

_dreaaaam_

_clAy_

_dude_

_why’d u leave dream_

_????_

_u okay?_

instead of replying he joins the call once again, the talking halts, the silence is deafening. he can hear himself gulp and winces. “dream?” he lets out a sigh of relief, they aren’t mad. “h-hey?” he stammers out, flushing at his stutter. red, hot embarrassment, throat feeling tight, holding in whines. “dude! where’ve you been?” sapnap beams out. dream shrugs, soon realizing they can’t see him and mumbles something, sounding like,, “i don’t know.” george speaks after a few moments of silence, sapnap not yet noticing the awkward silence, just glad dream is here. “why’d you leave earlier? we were worried, you idiot.” 

fuck. fuck. what lie should he use? his mom needed him? patches threw up? what is more believable? 

“uhhhh...patches threw up?” “dream, are you telling me or asking me.” “dude, at least make your lie believable.” 

“i’m...i’m not lying. why would i?" 

george sighs and dream can almost imagine him pinching the skin between his eyebrows in exasperation. “i dunno, dream. where’ve you been these last two days, can you even answer that truthfully? i thought honesty meant a lot to you.” 

“i can’t..i can’t tell you-” sapnap interrupts, “why?” “-maybe if you let me finish i’d tell you.” “rude, gogy, gogy, tell dream to stop being mean.” george laughs, but stops noticing dream's silence. “sapnap, shut up. dream, continue?” 

_“i don’t know why, but i wanna die.”_

they both take a sharp intake of air and george stampers out, “wh-what? dream, are you serious?” sapnap hasn’t said a word. was it wrong to tell them? oh. 

“clay. we are visiting you.” dream tries to think of a response, they can’t see. they can’t see how bad he is. he’s a wreck. “yo-you can’t-” “wh-” “- my-my mom’s visiting. she said she doesn’t want guests anytime soon.” 

“when will you stop lying?” “sapnap, i’m fine. fine.” “that doesn’t answer my question, dreamy.” “fuck off, _nick_.”

george cuts in, “i bought our tickets sap.” “you can’t just come, i said i’m fine.” “and we said we don’t fucking believe you, it’s okay to not be okay. you know that right?” “...um...okay...yeah.” 

after a few tense moments of nothing, he whispers a soft, “thank you.” 

dream will be okay. not now, it’ll be better with his boys. 

“can we play minecraft now?” 

“bedwars?”

“we are going to pop-off!”

“true.” 

_dream: i missed you :(_

_sapnap: i missed you too puppy_

_george: i’m here too_

_dream: i hate u_

_dream: u ruined the moment_

_george: pogn’t_

  
  
  


dream looks out the window, soft clouds blending into the night sky, like a bruise. the kind of bruise you get when you forget to wash the dishes. 

he should close his window.


End file.
